There is hope and restoration after abuse. The heart of Jesus is broken for you. He longs to heal your heart and draw you to Himself. He will gently guide you through the process of healing from the heartache of abuse and totally restore you as the Bible says, repay to you “the years the locust has eaten” (Joel 2:25).
We have all suffered in some way the wrongdoings of others. We must come to a place of humility and be willing to pour out all of our heart’s brokenness to allow the Lord to minister to all the places in our heart. He will build up the broken places. “Be still,” says the Lord, “and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10).
Child abuse is a terrible issue for an innocent mind to wrestle with. It is horrifying to think that children who survive the danger of street gangs, the public schools and the society in which we now live, come home to be abused by parents or authority figures. The home should be a place of safety and peace.
There are symptoms in adults which may indicate abuse as a child: lack of ability to trust; anger; identity crisis issues; deep inferiority; difficulty maintaining meaningful relationships; feelings of shame, guilt or fear; compulsive behavior, etc. All these must be brought to the Lord. Ask, seek and knock, as Jesus spoke of in Matthew 7:7. Keep knocking until you find a Christian counselor or mentor who is trained in your particular area of hurt. Whether it is the direct result of emotional, sexual, physical, or mental abuse, you need someone to lead you through the process of healing and forgiveness and stand with you in prayer.
Make absolutely certain you have taken the first step to accept Jesus as Lord by inviting Him to be your Savior. The Bible tells us that “all have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory” (Romans 3:23). You just have to confess, believe, and accept Jesus as Savior (For a prayer guide, please go to our Salvation page).
Not trivializing what you have experienced or are even now still experiencing, remember not to give up and stay with the healing process. The pain may be very deep in your heart and soul. The betrayal of trust is something no one can fully understand unless they too have walked in your shoes. You may even be angry at God wondering and questioning: “Why would this happen to me?” God is the one who can help you. He is the Great Healer and Lover of your soul. He wants you to be whole and totally set free from all abuse you have experienced.
Before Jesus died on the cross for every sin mankind would ever commit, His sweat became like “great drops of blood” (Luke 22:44). Later on in the chapter, the betrayer Judas gave Him over to enemy hands with the sign of a kiss. Jesus’ response was, “Judas, are you betraying the Son of man with a kiss?” He was obviously grieved at Judas’ betrayal.
Jesus was then taken to the Roman court where He was convicted and crucified. Crucifixion was known to be the worst possible death and most agonizing ever devised by mankind. Jesus died this way for you and for me. He died this way for the entire world that all who repent, confess and believe in His name would be saved.
Jesus Christ displayed his awesome love for mankind by forgiving us of our sin so that we might be redeemed to God. Judas also could have sought forgiveness from God. However, as the Bible tells us, we know Judas hung himself.
Jesus has so graciously forgiven and has set the example for us as well. Out of the love of God that fills our heart, we too must forgive others. There are no exceptions to this commandment. Jesus went on to say, “But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses” (Matthew 6:15).
As you uncover your wounds to the Lord in prayer and with a trusted counselor, allow the Lord to gently heal the injuries. The Bible tells us of a woman who found healing in the hem of Jesus’ garment. She said if she could only touch the hem of Jesus’ garment, she would be healed. She acted in faith to receive what she declared (Mark 5:25-29). There is a balm in Gilead! (Jeremiah 8:22). The “Physician” came to Gilead. His name is Jesus. He desires to heal you today.
Be totally honest telling God exactly how you feel when you pray. God will hear an honest prayer. Your healing is a process. Do not get discouraged with the amount of time it may take. Believe God each day as you choose to walk in forgiveness of all who have wronged you. Also, forgive yourself. One thing that will help is to write a journal of your feelings. Being able to write on paper the truth of your feelings will help set you free. Knowing God’s Word and acting on it will set you free (John 8:32).
Begin to renew your mind through the Word of God. “Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—His good, pleasing and perfect will” (Romans 12:2 NIV).
Do not allow the enemy to continue to violate you through your thought life. You must learn to discern his influence in your life. Anything that comes to your mind that is not in agreement with God’s Word is the enemy trying to get you to agree with his plan for you to destroy you. You have to resist these thoughts. Statements like, “This is the way I have always been,” or “I am in a rotten mood today,” come from your lips when you receive what the enemy is trying to put in your mind. Never allow yourself to settle for less than what God says about you and your life. Never allow yourself to settle for anything less than the attitude God desires for you to have in your heart. Do not allow the enemy to have your day, your spouse, or your home and family. The Bible tells us, “Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you”
(James 4:7 NIV).
As you learn to reject the enemy’s plan, you must continue to nurture the Word of GOD to daily feed upon what God says about you. You may feel this will take too long and think life is passing you by. You often will sense success in one area then totally experience defeat in another. Do not give in to the enemy. Decide to have a burning desire for the future, to overcome your fear of being hurt again, and begin to look forward to God’s plan for your life.
As you replace what happened in your life with what God says about you in His Word, you will begin to see change. Again, I remind you this is a process. Trust the Lord through the process.
You will know you have been totally healed when you do not feel any pain in your heart when sharing your testimony. Turn your heartache and pain into a testimony for God to help others walk through their pain to healing. You become an instrument of healing in the hands of God as you share how God brought healing to you.
PUTTING THE PAST BEHIND
Remember you have a past and a future. Do not allow what someone has done to you to destroy the rest of your life. Make a decision to move forward, get Godly counsel and press through the process to become whole. As you spend time reading and praying the Word of God daily, it is also good to just talk to God and share your heart with Him in times of prayer. Initially, this will first bring forgiveness and release to those who have hurt you. As the Lord reveals things to your mind, it is important to choose to forgive those and yourself while asking God to cleanse you. Release any instances that the Lord may bring to your mind.
This journey will help you rebuild your self-esteem and value. As you seek God, He will provide you with the strength you need daily to lead, guide, and direct you as you learn to trust God anew. God has a great purpose and plan for your life (Jeremiah 29:11).
SCRIPTURES TO READ:
Jeremiah 29:11 God has a plan and purpose for you
Psalm 46:10 Being still in God’s presence
Joel 2:25 God will restore
John 17:17 Cleansing through the Word of God
James 4:7 Submit to God, resist the devil
Ephesians 4:27 Give no place to the devil
Philippians 3:13-15 Forgetting the past, pressing forward
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